Can I Get Her Back?

The disservice we do to one another by not being honest during a breakup generally prolongs the inevitably heartbreak. When one breaks up with the buffer of “let’s be friends,” that door only opens a window of hope for the other person. If it is in your heart to move on as the person you are in a relationship is not “the one,” I encourage you to be honest and not give into the stress and anxiety of the moment.

David Asks Nancy:

“I broke up with my girlfriend about two months ago as she said she needed space and just wanted to be friends. I took it and tried playing it slow for a month. I then called her and even started to grovel and cry. This just made her angry. I said I would wait even if she went out with other men. In a panic tried about 23 times to text and ring her. Her friend texted me to stop it. I have spoken to her friend twice since then, but she advises me to move on. I even tried a fake date text to her (Sent to her phone) Yes dinner at 7pm sounds nice (another girl’s name but starting with same letter) Nothing has worked. I really love this lady and want her back.”

Nancy’s Advice:

The advice you received from your her friend is wise, as your ex does not have a desire to reconcile. Many times when breakups occur, it is natural to want closure which feels like the end. As you experienced, you two broke up and left the future open ended. The events and circumstances leading up to this point probably indicate that the relationship was not working for a long term commitment. Please do not try to push open a door which God has closed. It would be best to examine what you can learn from this experience in love and the role you played in its demise. Only by honest self-reflection will you be able to turn away from that barrier to love and not repeat the cycle.

About Nancy Pina

Nancy Pina is a relationship expert, author and coach with a passion to show how every individual can achieve relationship success. Her message of emotional healing based on Christian values has blessed countless individuals. Nancy has been featured in numerous national magazines including: Runner’s World, Esquire, Men’s Health, Cosmopolitan and Essence. She is a frequent guest on television and radio shows and has appeared on The Today Show, Fox News and Daystar Houston.
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