Getting ahead of God’s plan for marriage does have serious and lasting consequences. The good news is that He is a God of many chances to get on the correct path. Once you take the time to receive wise counsel and apply
Rachel Asks Nancy:
My boyfriend and I have been together for five years and have a young child. We talk a lot about marriage and he asked me at the beginning of our relationship to marry him. He bought me a ring and I have been wearing it but my boyfriend says he’s too nervous and is afraid my parents will be angry. I am 23 and unemployed and he is 24 and has had bad luck with keeping steady employment. I live with my parents and my boyfriend lives with his grandparents. I don’t want a big wedding and I’m afraid my parents will be mad if Ross and I start planning ours. How can we break the news to them?
From what you have written, this relationship is nowhere near ready for the responsibilities that come with marriage. For the sake of your child, I encourage you both to learn how to build a solid foundation for your eventual marriage through your church. It is vital that you learn how to interact with one another, learn effective communication skills and be prepared to present a positive relationship role model to your child. As spiritual head of your future house, your boyfriend needs to befriend men who have been in his position and soak in that wisdom and knowledge. Understanding, discernment and solid counsel are keys to your future. As an adult, it is your duel responsibility to share the news with your families of your future plans as a family unit. Presently, without funds I encourage you to take a frugal approach to your wedding and do not rely on your parents to foot any kind of bill. Marriage is not about the ceremony – it is about the daily growth in your relationship with each other and the strengthening of your mutual faith in the Lord.