Marriage and committed relationships require mutual nurturance. Without attention, they do suffer and the relationship changes and stops growing. When emotional needs are not being met and the demands of daily family life wear you down, the answer is never outside the relationship.
I got attracted to a guy (I am married and have kids). It was just physical attraction but it has led to great emotional dependency. Seeing him gave me a high and I knew it happened to him too. I realized that it was going too far and apologized to him (though he did not admit to it) and then confessed to my husband, promising never to think about this guy. I try to be loyal to my husband but my thoughts do go to that guy once in a while. He is a guy at my kid’s school and so I try to avoid him as much as I can…I need help to forget him and work on my marriage.
The key will be to discover why you do not feel emotionally validated in your marriage. What is it that you need from your husband that will make you feel emotionally connected to him? These are the types of questions I encourage you to explore within and then share those with your husband. Sometimes it’s difficult to get to the root of why you felt drawn away from your marriage, so I also suggest working with a Christian counselor.
I know it is difficult to break the mental image of what you wanted to idealize in love, however, it is important that you are very proactive in stopping those thoughts whenever they come to the surface. You do have charge over your thoughts and can lead your life based on what you know to be right instead of being led by the ups and downs and unpredictability of your emotions and feelings.
Avoiding this man is a very good strategy as it will give you the time to strengthen your commitment to work on your relationship with your husband. Please use this opportunity to appreciate the wonderful gift of a good husband and remember all the reasons why you first fell in love with him.